![Selecting Earth Creatures to A...](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_s_QgSDuMOt29T-t3LZLT2QCjxqy9rkaCzeP-Z05w_vVN0YrG3-rqpG1f1qZ-tJKqc6Nmh-Vz13yfgf7rK0gXFSE63ZQSU=s0-d)
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Location: Hellbilly Home PlaceIggy's note: I've asked our guests to wear a mic and a small camera when they enter the area. This dialogue and a few images were transmitted back to me, and I run it here in the interest of saving our world from a most nefarious plan...Subcommander Zeno: Hmmmm...perhaps I'll find experimental subjects like these. I wonder where the other earth-creatures are hiding?
![Oh my, large specimen!](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_tIScrPw7ACPgPtq7NgTas--gB_p_cLWWcyRWCiZgx0sibwh0Z5pfitoDfebIWPfZoRsW1GjUHnfucK1e0A0rRePEmLsF1g=s0-d)
![](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_tO7gN-ytJ6kuxh_ASBDe-Metlyf7CxBHTmS8IlHDReylDnBjlwT-ksYT_lLMLA3_Z3c626xwCsPdPYyT8CEVHkYK_fPtO3KpkLgCZSAO8mqRUyd-uVsqutW44rJRK2up-H0GwkLGOUic689aLKTMPq6hQpoM_JitNC0hvChkAiPpaJRKnJjXF61S7Gqt2Rrvm7WH3h7QW-36bfAW2jOJ8iHk0wuQQNazPu0YYmBC4x8Pm4OEgSg1VDKoLFoUr2PQUY-XD48gtcFuOTz_npCKXsWgkrTadKVqG9UrLR1c_Iw5eQeMgIn_I5I5_Hw6baZB2PLajn_6nv0W5N=s0-d)
Subcommander Zeno: Oh my. That large specimen is promising…
Subcommander Zeno: Greetings, earth woman
TammiFay Digfoot: greetins there little fella. . .yu's a cute wun yu is
Subcommander Zeno: define "cute," female human
TammiFay Digfoot: um.....purty tu look at
Subcommander Zeno blushes
Subcommander Zeno (aside):
heh heh. This impregnation may be rather simple...AHEM. Earth woman, you are needed for an....um....experiment
TammiFay Digfoot: expearment---what kind of expriment
Subcommander Zeno: now hold still. This won't hurt...
Subcommander Zeno: I hope
![Abduction Beam in Action](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_v27kSi1YQl7vw4Fa_16DqufF4xF4rPifhYEfQOIvQvYVJuCHZcWjCzGQ2VYLw-EI5rJmPcO-ZzvTOkM9i9z_ml3hTLhTA=s0-d)
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TammiFay Digfoot: OMG whut's that light
TammiFay Digfoot: i cain't see
TammiFay Digfoot: EEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKK!!!
TammiFay Digfoot: yu ain't so cute after all little man
TammiFay Digfoot: what on earf is that-thar green stuff?
Subcommander Zeno: I hope you enjoy the space-time portal ray
Subcommander Zeno: it will take you to my homeworld
Location: The Fortress of the Shining Overlord, Planet Blorg![Planet Blorg: Dont Ask!](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_tZuMD7NKt9eTo7zDDxS5wHUcqnluWBXdQ-Zioa7M_DdySXaaurNiGhbA4jZiWsrCcD4qq1QTmoWK6b7fAPIv4SJEW4a5o=s0-d)
![](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_vXMPyUn9znAaZQz7FPxNkstIcD2F-ZOnY5d83oOU0NqMI88mah-5wCmoSVuWR5ygDXAvjpM6VeAvJYR7eD9TZOp6Wd5sJwAc5AHGQYdg_LTnER7Clh-lqcVGK-tP49xVEKfCzfM6FGNKAa0wYCs8W3QwClYkmAuTWie3cjpkFzJ3qJO4hmfaD-TKwq9JLDIM398gfV19ng8Qi69FA6aUxojRAhgnKrWmt1CE0iXOUUHU74FoyQ4Gwqu4BYsmnj4EWqoAgTN2TYlfu_caQTK2Pil5NemfM5ICwDiUcPEDHymV-C29u5hfUq36EVz9qrh5wg9Tc1fBqSdZDy=s0-d)
Subcommander Zeno: now you are in the nerve center of our Leader's fortress!
TammiFay Digfoot: we's at Obama’s house?
Subcommander Zeno: ummm....yes. Sort of like that. Now follow me…
Subcommander Zeno: my, but you humans are big-boned, to judge from you and the other...specimen
TammiFay Digfoot: Whut “udder spacyman”?
Subcommander Zeno: To put it plainly in your earth-tongue, Yu'll git a gander rite soon-like. To get to our laboratory, you will, as one might say using a rather crude earth metaphor, "ride the rocket ship"
TammiFay Digfoot: well that’s mighty fine
TammiFay Digfoot: i ain’t never rode a rocket - 'cept at the county fair in Enoch Holler
![Time to Ride the Rocket Ship, ...](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_s8zziQ7mp7w7GMDAGRbm5pLq3-Pi8YcbNcV31TVqq4CljcU9AnWntTFe8qgFbSqaDOmohEXGTeZtncSnzfcRMRDE-xJTw=s0-d)
![](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_ujsPwTgaSrmHaf24LiQnj8YGXUvgHuwiFl4CKLAZdOOumdsC8NQHQqz1m2B71dtB3wfry9aOWq8iqxNPA-WB9mtjWzIdgJs3-t-OE5-uvyW5HhZDjm4H-hUqhwuSZGFFhsXo1aOE2PBrgipna8GMO2EAmwBkAzYvrtphnssFb6aJFyW5NW42dvBjyCes29RwVCltpdXSfqr1SHrn9JMM2QyL1BlThsd7EK96IQcT7elBPzpyhdgEWAOb74O3pKkybZxKLSWPsB9DFA=s0-d)
Subcommander Zeno: well, this is the "Deee-lux" edishum. It will transport us to the Impregnation Pylon.
TammiFay Digfoot: and it won’t a real rocket anyways..Impreg whut?
Subcommander Zeno: Oh, yu will luv that-thar mersheen. It duz funny stuff n' makes yu laff...like a wide-skreen tellyvishun. I are a-studyin' up on how y'all earth-critturs talks
TammiFay Digfoot: well i declare
Subcommander Zeno: learning your tongue will enable us to take ove...I mean befriend your race proper-like :) Now hop up an' we'uns will take us a ride.
TammiFay Digfoot: you is doin a mite respektable job sir, speakin' English good.
TammiFay Digfoot: can i fit up thar too?
Subcommander Zeno: yes I do declare yu kin
![My my! Dont injure me!](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_tlim49bM96LvvOIL3aIf3MJfluXgEqhwHnPWI7btz0YKzWV14E0eChK-CnVtzE_VuQH_pGdX524IJcKP2Bn5Wa01bvmELQ=s0-d)
![](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_vus7lI9luzMO90DogTDusA3gzjJrQU7acQsOFIxbFEK5WfuBDWQe925paoRgt6jK32_aaHV6vtHfNvPVWH62IkKBA2T0Z9Q4YV81G2XwnSE2GS9POhroNFu16tbmN0tl2fB7wsqPduRQGA8PwnYnRgiK0xlZjAgFVLlU_E9mEXao3eFnxKeMf5TtL6Ne2QMD9dCvwI1rwqnx6mx6kHYFsQut5wexClUWkvx0NFpDicSmEjYXX3KaeN9FLPAcLWmevSEKmaDXX0NumKB-bPjwC812ra_YiPYiwCO7Yuj8VYYEm8-R0BzQUvslrV1h5OglLFMQoK-0baXe4=s0-d)
Subcommander Zeno: (blushing green) oh my
TammiFay Digfoot: this looks comfy
Subcommander Zeno sweats a bit
TammiFay Digfoot: haha
TammiFay Digfoot: i think you like it
Subcommander Zeno: don't injure me
Location: Pylon of the Impregnation Engine![Impregnation Pylon](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_tuDX0U6MZq8zS_zksZblANl4TS5pFKVOf4Zcwf-Eb3GCT9DDPM0A0pR0ZDrPGgOwQVyqDen5zCxAbkUnKxxBrI2PoIbz4=s0-d)
![](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_vLx-YvSuaCcdKxDgizzfIzJRTm2byNmjjitMYhCegrvnyTgOnw6DB8j-ho8lMs7iMlfod5FGdzWV_S8qPfEKzODPp_9Npp9r3kvYtEewGx4tsXcwM1dvIIwdL5qWC0FY8JLalz88fZNlOKAamwKDcffGMT0nukfo4E-kzspnM2DiA_4ama3RUB9c9sjzc12DsD59YedgnKs5qj1463qYOttr098Fh6KEPZkjTekxUeOjY0-0IbFQNvJi55XFDozXnZibBNhlhwp7a3tB1W_XUIya0VMmMUoRHASRmgxPUcA5zhKfVrw-kkqqWJ5vaQqyezHRtnECDyH2QC=s0-d)
Subcommander Zeno: Curses. The Modulator is still not back from the shop?
TammiFay Digfoot: Huh?
Subcommander Zeno: Oh, just a technical issue. I ran this dad-gum mersheen wif'out it on the furst hillbilly. (aside)
Yet without it anything might happen. I need to run this experiment...the deadline for the world-conquest grant proposals is tomorrow! TammiFay Digfoot: fidgety little fella yu is
Subcommander Zeno: observe. . .get a bit closer :)
TammiFay Digfoot: what are we lukin at? Look s like a big warshin’ macheen
Subcommander Zeno: Impregnerashum mersheen
TammiFay Digfoot: lord he’s drunk & speakin spanish...um...i seen em in town once
Subcommander Zeno: yu did? Well, not like this. Have a seat :)
Subcommander Zeno: straddle it like yu’s a-ridin a mule tu town…WHEE HOO
Subcommander Zeno turns on the Impregnation EngineSubcommander Zeno: do you feel...odd?
TammiFay Digfoot: i feel a mite tingly inside
Subcommander Zeno: oh YES...it's working...as it did on the other one
Subcommander Zeno: say...on earth...
Subcommander Zeno: which gender produces the young?
TammiFay Digfoot: whut?
Subcommander Zeno: I forgot to ask the male
TammiFay Digfoot: you needs to speak english mistopher… i dont know no furen languages
Subcommander Zeno: du babies kum frum gals o' frum fellers?
TammiFay Digfoot: oh - from gals - why didn't you say so
Subcommander Zeno: uh oh
TammiFay Digfoot: i'm feeling hongry
Subcommander Zeno: oh...never mind
TammiFay Digfoot: you gots a sammitch in there?
Subcommander Zeno: Sammitch? No, but…I took this earth beverage from the other subject…he said it eases the process by which earth female can…um..complete our experiment.
Subcommander Zeno takes a pull on the jug
TammiFay Digfoot: mistopher i don't understand yo fancy langumage
Shine jug wif drunk (v.2) whispers: watch that third sipSubcommander Zeno: Have sum Shine! Hic…
TammiFay Digfoot: oohhh....shine I understand that wun
Subcommander Zeno: it powered my...hic…spacecraft
Subcommander Zeno stumbles
Subcommander Zeno: sho....
Subcommander Zeno: lesh GO! Burp!
TammiFay Digfoot: aww little feller caint hold his likker
Subcommander Zeno: HOOO WHEE
TammiFay Digfoot: watch now little feller
TammiFay Digfoot: take it easy
TammiFay Digfoot: yo's a wobblin like a newborned calf
Subcommander Zeno: hic
TammiFay Digfoot takes the jug...whar am we goin' tu NOW?
Subcommander Zeno: we am a goin' tu...tu...a whachamacall it...
Subcommander Zeno: ZOO!
TammiFay Digfoot: Yee Haw! I luvs the zoo...can i git me sum peanuts & a co-cola?
Subcommander Zeno: Sho nuff kin! But....yu gits mor'n that…yu gits impregnated.
TammiFay Digfoot: What am "Impregnerated"?
Subcommander Zeno: well, this-hear mersheen gits you--burb--wif a chile, missy
TammiFay Digfoot: chile is too spicy fo me hon…makes me powerful gassy
Subcommander Zeno: no…I means yu now am expectin' a bun in the oven
TammiFay Digfoot: ooh a sticky bun – they am good too…I'll take wun of those
Subcommander Zeno: an rite soon yu gits tu meet your love-mate in our ALIEN ZOO
TammiFay Digfoot: Yu dun menshuned that-thar zoo alreddy. Whar’s mah peanuts & co-cola?
Subcommander Zeno: in our zoo...hic…there is an earthman yu knows…Pappy Enoch.
TammiFay Digfoot: Dang his hide. Well,it will be fun anysohow. I loves the zoo! They got ellyfants thar?
Subcommander Zeno: no—burp--ellyphunts
Subcommander Zeno: just Pappy
Subcommander Zeno: does he count?
TammiFay Digfoot: well close enuff. Let's go.
Subcommander Zeno (aside):
Muahaha. Little does she know what lies ahead...![Alien Zoo!](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_v4O7ffZ9ATSNMZvTov2YDux4otExdOMCmf2vYjKTSrKtjJ0CtqJaQyNDLo2g_kNnetLYIwgk2deLLnuT7xoqOuvySsEh5W=s0-d)
![](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_twgEbkmzBXTcZf0a-dGLHrxOhnVbomYVSU5sb3neO2z0NtRnTQhybycdLGnu5YGFDjAui-LKLOtgZDv29zpy-q2rzP-1QyLlaV6jbPToO7MEk8A08cYqlV4SMuAtieAJAeBC8SOB0SrP7Gq7jJ4rXKoqn8AKA_Bsz-76WYELzd0pV7BCVfyTkN3DRV_4pFeGs3-N5hOsQuOBcHxQ18t-gpAlLNYiNHjPNrbraPZ5tycuz7Pj9EOCwQ9d0a5f2cXWlxtjGcbR7wjUmj0g10w_JapxdOVkdmRL1d0xrTuamBZPIGEno0Ioqc0fmmK9yCOgWBK0Pz6tWCDklQ=s0-d)
To be continued…